Recent Unsent E-mails from Antonin Scalia to Richard Posner, as Retrieved from Justice Scalia’s “Deleted E-Mail” Files

To: Richard Posner

From: Antonin Scalia

Date: August 24, 2012

Re: Your Review of Reading Law

Dear Dick:

Thanks for your interesting review of Reading Law in The New Republic. Mr. Garner and I certainly appreciate your thoughts. I, personally, am especially pleased that you found time to mull over our humble text, given your busy schedule of giving NPR interviews criticizing Republicans as “goofy” on the one hand, and constructing baby-trading markets on the other.

Yours,

Antonin Scalia

 

To: Richard Posner

From: Antonin Scalia

Date: August 24, 2012

Re: Your Review of Reading Law

Dear Dick:

Came across your review of Reading Law in The New Republic.  I appreciate your comments, and even though you find fault with what we write, as they say, any publicity is good publicity! I would have written sooner, but I was busy re-reading a few of my favorite Court opinions: Black v. United States (2010), Carr v. United States (2010),  Lewis v. City of Chicago (2010), Chambers v. United States (2009), Hein v. Freedom from Religion Foundation, Inc. (2008). . . . Mercy.  The list could go on, and on.  So much to read!

Regards,

Antonin Scalia

 

To: Richard Posner

From: Antonin Scalia

Date: August 24, 2012

Re: Your Review of Reading Law

Dear Dick:

Thank you for your review of Reading Law in The New Republic. I would have written sooner, but it takes some time for things to make it from down where you are — remind me, are there 13 Courts of Appeals these days, or 14? — up to here, at the one United States Supreme Court. In any event, let me say this: In terms of the accuracy of your work, and the time, care, and effort you invest in it, you are to modern jurisprudes what Bill Stern was to mid-century baseball sportswriters. Or, what Dane Cook is to modern stand-up comics.

As always, I am pleased that you are a former colleague of mine, and I will waste no time in urging my colleagues on the Supreme Court to hire your clerks for our future terms.

Regards,

Antonin Scalia

 

To: Richard Posner

From: Antonin Scalia

Date: August 24, 2012

Re: Your Review of Reading Law

Dear Dick:

I just finished reading your review of Reading Law in The New Republic. I understand, from your review, that you had some difficulties grasping the arguments that we made in the book. Perhaps the problem was one of translation. Let me offer my response in language that I suspect that you will understand a little better: Your Review = (Words x Formatting) – Coherence – Persuasiveness = Breaking the Deadlock: The 2000 Presidential Election and the Courts + Uncertain Shield: The U.S. Intelligence System in the Throes of Reform + Not a Suicide Pact: The Constitution in a Time of National Emergency + Countering Terrorism: Blurred Focus, Halting Steps.

Please let me know if I might be of assistance in helping you decode my future works, possibly by revising the text to put it in X-axis/Y-axis graph form.

Best,

Antonin Scalia

 

To: Richard Posner

From: Antonin Scalia

Date: August 24, 2012

Re: Your Review of Reading Law

Dear Dick:

Just read your review of Reading Law in The New Republic.  Thanks for your thoughts!  I’m looking forward to what I presume to be your upcoming book in the same vein, Winging It: How To Produce Opinions That Oscillate Between Brilliance And Overbroad, Erroneous, And, Frankly, Embarrassing Assertions Regarding Various Areas Of The Law. My dog, Chester, is a big fan of your work, and I’m sure he’ll enjoy your next one, too. BTW, Chester told me that Overcoming Law was especially delicious.

Regards,

Antonin Scalia

 

***

OK, not really.

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8 Responses

  1. Kyle, this is brilliant. We know that Scalia does write letters to the Washington Post, which he shoves in the drawer. Also, there was just a tad of Scalia flair in Garner’s response to Posner. i would not be surprised if the Justice was involved.

  2. Shag from Brookline says:

    The brilliance of Scalia and Garner was the market-timing for publication as the ACA decision was coming down. Alas, perhaps they couldn’t throw in an Epilog about CJ Roberts’ decision as violative of their text’s foundations. But that may be in the next edition. Judge Posner might respond to Josh by suggesting that Scalia should have shoved some of his opinions in that same drawer – or elsewhere.

  3. Always nice to see that Supreme Court Justice are people too. They put their pants on one leg at a time and heap disingenuous praise just like the rest of us.

  4. AndyK says:

    Brilliant!

  5. Kyle says:

    On the evening of September 7, I fixed a typo in the third e-mail.

    For those of you who don’t know — it’s a pretty obscure reference — Bill Stern was a sportswriter who rarely let inconvenient facts, or a lack thereof, get in the way of a good story. (He was quite good at telling stories, though.) And the cases related by Scalia are, of course, matters in which the United States Supreme Court reversed Judge Posner. But you all probably knew that already.

  6. Shag from Brookline says:

    Justice Scalia’s famous drawer may be a potential Mt. Etna. I’m wondering if it includes an unsent Email responding to my DeNovo comment some years back concerning VP Cheney:

    “JE NE RECUSE!”

    In that duck blind
    Lady Justice unveils
    Her traditional blindfold
    For these bonding males:
    Scalia and Cheney,
    Shotguns at attack,
    Taking aim at Justice,
    “QUACK, QUACK, QUACK!”

    Posted by: Shag from Brookline at March 23, 2004 07:28 AM”

  7. BobN says:

    Imagining Scalia making a spot-on reference to Dane Cook got me going

  8. waynegparker says:

    People forget that people in the government are people too. They make mistakes, and deal with things just like we do. http://www.hanna-law.com/legal.htm