FTC v. Santa

Jeff Jarvis has this humorous piece about the FTC vs. Santa:

Federal Trade Commission Chairman Jon Leibowitz today announced a record fine against Santa Claus for violations of the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act.

“Mr. Claus has flagrantly violated children’s privacy, collecting their consumer preferences for toys and also tracking their behavior so as to judge and maintain a data base of naughtiness and niceness,” Leibowitz said. “Worse, he has tied this data to personally identifiable information, including any child’s name, address, and age. He has solicited this information online, in some cases passing data to third parties so they may fulfill children’s wishes. According to unconfirmed reports, he has gone so far as to invade children’s homes in the dead of night. He has done this on a broad scale, unchallenged by government authorities for too long.”

I also heard that DHS has called for the arrest of Santa for flying over restricted airspace.  The FBI is seeking his records about those who are naughty.  The TSA is upset that he bypassed security screening.  Meanwhile, his reindeer are being charged with cyberbullying Rudolf.  And he’s in trouble with the NLRB for his restrictive social media policy forbidding his elves from blogging about their low pay and inability to unionize. . . .

 

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2 Responses

  1. Orin Kerr says:

    “Meanwhile, his reindeer are being charged with cyberbullying Rudolf.”

    Dan, I think you mean “cariboullying.”

  2. Joe says:

    The USDOJ page lists a PPACA lawsuit that trumps this:

    Yahweh v. Obama (W.D. TN).